The Waiting Game

March 1st, 2010

Was exactly one year ago. It was also the day I received a note saying I had been accepted into AFS-Spain.


Yesterday I was reading through my journal that I have been keeping since 1/25/10, which was the day I found out AFS accepted my application. After hearing from AFS-USA, the next step is to wait and find out for the host country to accept your application. And finally after that, you have the waiting process to hear from your host family.

For those of you who have gone or are going through the waiting process, it is a very difficult one. First, you have to wait to see if you will be living in the same country the upcoming year. This brings questions. A lot of questions. And with questions comes uncertainty.


Not being able to tell someone whether you will returning for another school year is very frusterating. Will you be on the basketball team next year? Will you be in band? Will you be going to prom? Should you sign up for that club? Do you need to read that summer reading list for literature class? Should you buy that sweatshirt? Because if you do, are you going to bring it with you on your trip?


Try planning your life once year in advance. It drives you crazy- I know. And even more- it's impossible. Every comment made about "next year" or "next time", you are stuck there questioning yourself- "but will I be here?"


So you tell them. I may not be here. Their response? ..."Well you don't know?" Of course you don't. ..."And when will you know?" ...the answer?

"I don't know."


So there it is. The waiting game stopped for me March 1st, 2010. Right?

Not even close.

Being an exchange student ultimately is the biggest waiting game in the world. Finding out your host family does not end the game. After you find your host family, you have unanswered questions. You meet your host family, and get excited for school. You get excited for school, and you start looking forward to the next event. Halloween. Christmas. Or maybe your country doesn't even celebrate those.

The New Year. Spring Break.

Pretty soon you are looking at the end of your year. But wait. You just got accepted?


And even when you get back home, you are just thinking about when you will see your friends again, or when you are able to return to your host country.


So there it is. An exchange year. The ultimate waiting game.


Somehow I can clearly remember this day, one year ago. The clarity of this memory actually scares me in so many different ways. One year down.

But I have time left, right?

Let's hope so. What I've learned from this is to live in the present. You can't always look to the future because when you get there, you'll have forgotten to have lived your past.



Step by steps my friends, step by step.

-mb